Comments on: Is four months to short of a time to plan a wedding?

By: Sage

Sage — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 20:55:59 +0000

i started planning in mid May of this year and the wedding is on August 8th, so that’s less than 4 months. only about 50 or 60 guests and its in a small town, but i could’ve done it in less time if i had to.

also my parents got married 4 months after they started dating, back in 1981 and they are still happily married. they had an outdoor wedding with only close family and friends and only cake and mints at the reception. simple and elegant.

so it all depends. if you want something super extravagant it may be a time crunch, but if you’re spending a lot of time daily and are organized, you should be able to pull off a great wedding.

good luck and congratulations!
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b2b 8/8/09

By: Mrs. M

Mrs. M — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 20:40:59 +0000

it depends. i planned mine in 2 but had 6 months. I wasn’t picky so that helped alot and i didn’t need alot of decreations

it doesn’t matter whos paying. if his family wants to help, let them.

best of luck and congrats!
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By: Doodlestuff

Doodlestuff — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 20:00:59 +0000

First, yes, you can plan a wedding in 4 months. It’s a lot harder to plan a large wedding in that time, but a small wedding is easily doable since there are so many more venues for groups under 75.

As the hosts, your family has the final say, but certainly, your fiance’s family can have some input on the wedding.
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By: kissbutnevertell

kissbutnevertell — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 19:25:59 +0000

4 months is enough time to plan a wedding. You must stay organized and use your friends and families for much needed help. Since it is a short time period, you may stress a little more, but being organized will make all the difference. I would make sure that the venue locations are available first and then get your dress ordered and altered. I dont think it matters who pays for the wedding. These days the bride and groom are paying for it all. I think that your fiance's family opinion should be taken into consideration even though they arent paying for it.
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By: Adrianne

Adrianne — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 18:54:59 +0000

Timeframe really only matters when it comes to booking your vendors. I went to a wedding last night that they organized in 3 weeks, but the vendors were all available on a Thursday, so it worked out fine. Call your ceremony and reception venues first (and your caterer if it’s not included), then your DJ and bakery, with a list of your preferred dates and what’s still available. 4 months from now is what? October/November? You stand a pretty good chance by being away from the main "wedding season". But get moving on your dress, like, now – that can take a while, especially when you factor in any alterations.

If your fiance’s family WANTS to pay, you should definitely let them have some input (whether you choose to accept their money or not). But if not, you should still get their guest list and keep them up-to-date with how things are going. Traditionally, the bride’s family paid for the whole wedding anyway, so that’s not all that strange – these days, though, many couples pay for it themselves or sometimes both sides of the family chip in. Just be sure you talk to your parents about the budget before you even start shopping around – if you’re only giving them 4 months notice, you may have less to work with than if you waited until next year.

Congrats!
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By: Kelly H

Kelly H — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 18:46:59 +0000

Four months is tight. Finding a venue or vendors that are available on the date you want may be difficult or expensive on such short notice. It could probably be done if you have a wedding planner or can devote all of your time to doing only that. If you’re doing it all, less time means more stress. If you’re paying others, less time probably means more cost.

It’s traditional to have the bride’s family pay for the wedding entirely, even if it’s not very common these days. I think that whoever pays for the wedding gets to make the choices. Hopefully choices are made that everyone can be happy with.
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By: Married with daughter

Married with daughter — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 18:12:59 +0000

check the library they have etiquette books on who pays for what……….you might be able to get it off the internet……your family should not pay for everything….if you do most of the work…..you can plan a wedding in a month…….you have to make check list to make sure you did not forget some thing……make sure you pay all deposits right away….make sure every thing is confirmed
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By: starr1701

starr1701 — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 17:41:59 +0000

hi
I know 4 months is enough and my family paid for it all except my dress but it was All done and very nicely too
but Jenny has a point too maby your parents don’t have enough money to pay for the wedding now or they just think you rushing it
for you fiance family having a say they should have some to say but not much if they aren’t paying anything but you husband to be should have say no matter what he is part of the wedding
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By: fizzygurrl1980

fizzygurrl1980 — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 16:59:59 +0000

Four months is long enough to plan a wedding in theory, but you will probably end up feeling quite rushed and overwhelmed- not to mention the fact that many popular reception venues book up over a year in advance, so you might be out of luck finding a place to get married on such short notice.

It is true that the bride’s family traditionally pays for the wedding, but in recent years it has become more common for the bride and groom to handle all or part of the expenses themselves, now that people are waiting longer than they used to to get married and now often have good jobs and live on their own by that time.

Just out of curiosity, though, may I ask why you are getting married so quickly? No judgment- just wondering because being engaged is a really fun time of your life, with all the attention and parties, etc. I’ve been engaged for nearly 18 months now, and I’m so glad I had all that time to just enjoy it. I got to plan the wedding at a leisurely pace, and my fiance and I were able to save up all the money we need for the wedding because we’ve been saving about $100 per paycheck since about a year ago, so it’s not been too stressful to afford.
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By: Soon to be Mrs. M

Soon to be Mrs. M — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 16:48:59 +0000

You better get going! Most venues are booked up for a year! You will have to go buy a wedding dress as is because there is no way you can get alterations done in time. Also if you want a photographer start looking now! I’m a wedding photographer and my weekends are booked for the next year.
it can be done though depending on what you want. If you want something at a large hall with lots of flowers, decorations, cake, dj, ect you may be cutting it close.
If you want something in your backyard then it’s doable.

As for your parents paying. It’s fine if they want to. We are paying for our wedding, but my mother insists on throwing something in as a gift since she’s been saving up since I was born and his parents are the same. So we are using their funds as deposit on another house and to buy another car. You shouldn’t exclude your fiance’s parents. I mean, don’t tell them that they have to get over it because your parents are paying. If they want to invite someone and you have room for it then by all means, let them invite them. However, if your guest list is small then they have to cut their guests because your parents are paying for the meals.

Don’t let anyone say "Two adults should be able to pay for their wedding" because there are a lot of parents who WANT to pay for their childs wedding.
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